


In The Shadow of Guilt

by Junk_Dog



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Parents, Alternate Universe - BDSM, Alternate Universe - Mental Institution, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Anxiety, BDSM, Child Abuse, Childbirth, Childhood Memories, Childhood Trauma, Dark Past, Depression, Dominant Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Eventual Smut, Flashbacks, Fluff and Smut, Gay Sex, Hospitals, Kidnapping, Light BDSM, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Mental Institutions, Oral Sex, POV Multiple, Parent/Child Incest, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Past Murders, Past Sexual Abuse, Physical Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Torture, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Sex, Sex, Sex Toys, Sexual Abuse, Shower Sex, Smut, Submissive Eren Yeager, Suicidal Eren, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, There are bad things ahead, Torture, Underage Sex, dark au, suicidal Levi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2020-07-27 23:42:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20054473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Junk_Dog/pseuds/Junk_Dog
Summary: Eren Jaegar has had a tough life, from family members dying, to abuse from his father, and plenty of mental health issues. After Eren’s latest suicide attempt, he is admitted to the ArbourCat Behavioral Center, where he meets raven-haired Levi Ackermann. Both boys seem to detest each other at first, but as they warm up to each other, they slowly become friends. In fact, maybe even more than friends. Is it possible that they will be able to change each other’s lives for the better? Or perhaps for the worst?





	1. Chapter 1

**Hi everyone! I know the tags are just loaded with sadness and awfulness, but I’ve had this idea to write this story for some time now. Part of the story will take place in a psych ward. Some of my writing for this part will be based on experience, actually part of the entire story will be based on some of my experiences with mental health and mental institutions. I will let you know what parts in the notes of the chapter if you are interested to know. I am better now though, so no worries there. I honestly think this will help me move on from things while also being able to write about feelings and such. **


	2. Prologue: The Story of Zeke Jaeger

April 2nd, 2001. That is the day I died. 

Nothing was special about me. I was just an ordinary person living an ordinary life. Or so I thought. 

Growing up was easy living. I had a pretty normal childhood growing up. I had plenty of friends, I went to school, received gifts on Christmas, all of it. I had a hard-working, smart as a whip man for a father. He was good-natured, a good father, and always made sure to put his family first no matter the cost. He didn’t stand out much, except for the dopey-looking circle glasses he wore. To bad for me I inherited his godawful vision so I was stuck wearing those too. 

As for my mother, what a beautiful lady was she. She had the prettiest golden hair you would ever see. It was such a rich color of honey glaze that you could almost smell the sweet, floral aroma from it. She was an outspoken woman, but certainly stood her ground when needed be. But most of all, she was the most caring, kindest mother anyone could ask for. She spoiled me rotten with her love and warmth, and I couldn’t have been a happier child.

As for my parents’ relationship, their couldn’t have been a stronger couple in the world. They fed off each other’s weaknesses and played upon each other’s strengths. Sure, they had their little disagreements here and there, but as far as I could see it only made their love grow stronger for each other each and everyday. The both made a modest living, my father being a doctor, and my mother working at a nonprofit organization for people who were underprivileged. We all went away on holiday, ate dinner together, and talked about our day was at school or how work was going. At the end of the day, we were a family. And a pretty happy one too I might add. But that only lasted for eleven years too short. I was only truly happy for the first eleven years of my life, before all hell broke loose. In fact, hell is an understatement. It was a living nightmare, and one that could only be escaped by eternal sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for such a long wait! It’s been a very busy and stressful time in my life from switching colleges and getting a couple jobs. Also, I know this is a really short chapter. I’m going to go back and add to it, but I’m really tired right now and honestly need some encouragement. I really want to write this, and it’s all swelling inside my head like a balloon with ideas, but it’s really difficult for me to put it down on paper. I wish I could just transfer my thoughts into this. If only it were that simple... Anyways, hope you all are doing well! :)


End file.
